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So, I dig into dis, right? Been around forever – ancient Greeks, dey rubbed each oder down after wrestling, naked and sweaty, no shame! Little fact for ya – Egyptians used it too, wit fancy oils, like dey vere pharaohs of pleasure. Makes me happy, dis history – humans always chasing dat good touch, ya? But den, I get mad – vhy nobody told me sooner?! Coulda been oiled up years ago, not just plotting vorld domination!

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So, I head out, gear in tow, down the streets of Charlton. You know, like Charlton Park Road, where the trees are all leafy and stuff. I’m feelin’ good, got me lucky cap on. But then, bam! I step in a puddle. Not just any puddle, but the kinda puddle that’s like a mini lake. My boots are soaked. Great start, eh?

Charlton Athletic Women / Newcastle United Women - English Women's Championship - The Valley