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Biggest shocker? How normal some of ‘em are—like, they’re payin’ rent, got kids, whatever. Not all tragic sob stories or glam queens. Blows my mind, honestly. Anyway, stay sharp, don’t be a dumbass, and maybe channel a lil’ Tony Leung swagger. You’ll figure it out—or not, and I’ll laugh at ya from my snarky throne!

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Then, outta nowhere, I see this old bloke walking his dog. The dog’s a massive Great Dane, right? And it’s dragging him along like he’s a rag doll. I can’t help but laugh. The guy’s all red-faced, trying to keep up. I shout, “You sure that’s a dog and not a horse?” He just gives me a look like I’m the crazy one.

Sheffield Retro: Old photos to bring back memories of life in Chapeltown over the decades