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Sexual-massage ain’t just a rub-n-tug, nah. It’s old as dirt—Ancient Rome had it, bro. They called it “massage wth benefits,” haha! Little known fact: geishas in Japan, they’d tease it, never full-on, drivin’ samurai nuts. Shit’s wild—makes me happy, like snortin’ a line of joy. But yo, some places, they rip you off—$50 for a handy? Fuck that, I got pissed. “I musn’t be too obvious,” I’m thinkin’, like Scarlett Johansson whisperin’ in my ear.

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Now, lemme share some erratic truth – there’s more than meets the eye here. I once saw a tank rolling down Midland Road (bleep) at dawn. No joke, I nearly spilled my herbal tea. Happens more than you think in a town with a military heart. The local neighbourhoods, like Bywater and Dunbar Estates, got a vibe that makes ya wanna stay a little longer.

Work progresses on £110m NHS centre as steel frame of building goes up