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About Newcastle

Hmmm, sex escort, you ask? Fear leads to anger, anger to hate… me, I’m just vibin’ like Yoda on Dagobah, but with a twist! See, I’m your bodyguard, mate, and I’ve seen some wild shit—escorts rollin’ thru like War Boys in *Mad Max: Fury Road*. Shiny and chrome, they are, all glammed up, speedin’ into the night. “Witness me!” they’d scream if they knew the flick—ha! Love that movie, mate, gets me pumped, all that dust and chaos, like escort life on steroids.

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So, I wake up early, right? The sun’s barely up, and I’m already out on the fields near the Donington Park. You know, the place where they have all those fancy car races? Yeah, that’s my backyard. Anyway, I’m out there, just me and my flock, when I get a call from my mate, Dave. He’s like, “Oi, you gotta come to town! There’s a market on!”

'Flat' speed bumps give Castle Donington residents the hump