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So, check this – sexual-massage ain’t new, been around forever, like ancient Rome orgy vibes. Bet ya didn’t know them Greeks used it to “heal” soldiers – ha! “Healing,” my ass, they just wanted some naked fun. Makes me laugh, those sneaky bastards. I’m happy as hell picturin’ it, but pissed too – why ain’t I born back then? Coulda been emperor of massages, screamin’, “Respect my authoritah!” while some chick rubs me down.
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Everyone’s panicking, and I’m just standing there, thinking, “This is how I die. In a pub, with a bunch of models.” But it turns out it was a false alarm. Phew! We all laugh it off, and I’m like, “See? Just a drill for my big debut!”
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