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Oi, listen up, ya filthy animals! Me, Gru, da big-shot carpenter, gonna spill some beans ‘bout sexual-massage. Yah, dat steamy stuff! Lightbulb! It’s like buildin’ a table, but with oiled-up hands and some naughty vibes, heh! So, I’m tinking, dis massage biz, it’s old—older dan my babushka’s socks. Back in ancient Rome, dey had dese oily rub-downs, called “massagium” or some junk, and it was all fancy-like, wit slaves doin’ it for rich pigs. Dat’s wild, eh? Makes me mad—dey had it good, and I’m here hammerin’ nails!

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I finally get to my spot, near the river. It’s peaceful, ya know? Birds chirpin’, water flowin’. But then, BAM! Outta nowhere, this dog comes barrelin’ through, chasin’ a squirrel. I’m like, “Dude, chill!” The owner’s shoutin’, “Baxter, come back!” But Baxter’s on a mission. He knocks over my charcoal bags. I’m fumin’. “Oi! Watch it, mate!” But the owner just laughs. I mean, c’mon! My day’s already off to a rough start.

Guildford Borough Council ask county council to support new train stations in Merrow and Park Barn