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Me, I’m old-school, right? I’d rather vibe with someone real, face-to-face, not this app shit. But I get it—sex-datin’ be quick, easy, like fast food for your heart, ya feel? Ain’t my thang, but if it’s yours, do you, boo! Just watch out, ‘cause it’s a trip—some find love, some find freaks, and some just find a damn headache. Fo’ shizzle, that’s the gospel from your boy Snoop, the clergyman with the chill, droppin’ truth like it’s 1993. Peace!

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I finally get to my spot, near the river. It’s peaceful, ya know? Birds chirpin’, water flowin’. But then, BAM! Outta nowhere, this dog comes barrelin’ through, chasin’ a squirrel. I’m like, “Dude, chill!” The owner’s shoutin’, “Baxter, come back!” But Baxter’s on a mission. He knocks over my charcoal bags. I’m fumin’. “Oi! Watch it, mate!” But the owner just laughs. I mean, c’mon! My day’s already off to a rough start.

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