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So, I tried it, right? Tinder, Bumble, all that jazz. Thought I’d find a hunk, a real catch. Nope! Got a dude sendin’ dick pics—unasked! Made me so mad, I nearly threw my phone! Like, “I’m not your harvest, creep!”—straight outta the movie, ya feel me? But then, oh THEN, I met this cutie. Sweet, shy, total vibe. We’re chattin’, it’s hot, I’m thinkin’—score! Little known fact, babe: 1 in 5 hookups start online now. Crazy, right?

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First off, I’m tryna get my gear together. You know, the usual – bags of charcoal, tools, all that jazz. I live near the Burpham Downs, which is a nice spot, but the weather? Ugh, typical British nonsense. It was drizzling, then sunny, then drizzling again. Make up your mind, Mother Nature!

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