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Texture-wise, it’s a nightmare—slimy hands, no grip. I’d sculpt a damn buffalo before touchin’ that scene. Fun fact: ancient Greeks did it—called it “bodywork.” Horny bastards. Surprised me they had time ‘tween wars. Now it’s all “wellness” crap—makes me wanna puke.

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After that, I decide to grab some lunch at The Fisherman’s Return. Best fish and chips in town, no contest. I order, and while I’m waiting, I overhear this old bloke at the next table. He’s going on about the price of fish. I mean, come on, mate! I’m an economist, not a fishmonger! But I can’t help but listen. He’s ranting about how prices are rising, and I’m like, “Dude, tell me something I don’t know!”

Village road ‘shut for some time’ after collision