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But oh man, the escort could piss me off—carburetor actin’ up, fixin’ it in the rain, hands black as sin. Once saw a dude soup up an Escort XR3i—turbo screamin’, thought, “Whoa, this ain’t no happy little tree, it’s a freakin’ beast!” Surprised me, legit—didn’t know escorts could flex like that. Fun fact, y’all: they raced these bad boys in rallies, kickin’ dirt, takin’ names—ain’t that wild?

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After that, I stroll down to the Old Gaol. It’s this old prison turned museum, and I’ve always found it kinda creepy but cool. I’m wandering around, checking out the exhibits, when I overhear this group of tourists. They’re all like, “Did you know Buckingham was once the capital of England?” I’m standing there, rolling my eyes. Like, duh! Everyone knows that! But then I think, “Maybe they don’t?”

Buckingham Palace releases statement after Prince Harry's bombshell interview