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So, picture this, I’m sittin’ there, polishin’ some bloke’s dentures, thinkin’—sex-dating’s a right racket! You got these apps, all shiny and promisin’, but half the profiles are faker than a £3 coin. Blokes posin’ with fish—why, mate? You shaggin’ the cod or what? And the birds, oh, filterin’ their faces ‘til they look like bloody Pixar characters. Makes me wanna yell, “Drainage! Drainage, Eli, you boy!”—‘cos they’re suckin’ the life outta ya with every swipe.

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Research has shown that couples who communicate openly and regularly about their sexual preferences are more likely to experience greater sexual satisfaction.

Finally, I headed home, feelin’ all sorts of emotions. Happy, angry, surprised – you name it. Broadfield really knows how to keep ya on your toes. I plopped down on my couch, exhausted. What a day, right? Just another wild ride in Broadfield. Can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings!

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