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But here’s what bugs me—why’s it gotta be so secretive? Like, I’m whisperin’ ‘bout it now! Society’s all judgy, like I’m confessin’ to arson. I’m like, “I don’t know who I am!”—straight outta *Memento*, ‘cause I’m questionin’ my whole life after one session. Felt good, though—muscles loose, mind blown, like I fought a fire and won. But the typos in my brain? I’m thinkin’ “massage” but writin’ “messgae”—ugh, my fingers betray me! And the oil? Slippery as hell! Nearly slid off the table, like, “Who’s got the facts here?”—another *Memento* vibe, chasin’ truth in a haze.

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First stop, the garage on Tulse Hill. You know the one? Yeah, that’s the spot. Got a call from some bloke sayin’ his car was makin’ weird noises. I’m thinkin’, “Great, just what I need.” So I roll up, and this guy’s standin’ there lookin’ like he’s seen a ghost. Turns out, his exhaust was hangin’ off like a bad haircut. I mean, come on, mate! How do you let it get that bad?

Police investigate unexplained death after body found in Brixton Hill