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Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, yeah, the wizard, and I’m here to chat about escort – not that fancy car, nah, the Ford Escort, legend of the streets! “You shall not pass!” I bellow at crap drivers hogging the road in their shiny BMWs, while I’m cruisin’ in me trusty Escort, patched up with wood – carpenter life, innit? Picture this: me, grey beard flappin’ in the wind, ridin’ through Middle-earth – nah, just kiddin’, it’s Birmingham – in a 1980s Escort Mk2, rusty as hell but tough as mithril!
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After that, I decide to check out the old church on Church Street. It’s stunning, honestly. The architecture is mad impressive. I’m standing there, just taking it all in, when I hear this loud crash. Turns out, some scaffolding fell over. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed!” But the locals are all calm, like it’s just another Tuesday. I’m standing there, heart racing, thinking, “Is this place cursed or what?”
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