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So, I’m tinkin’, right, dese escorts—dey hustle hard. Fact ya don’t know: some been round since old Soviet days, smugglin’ sexy vibes cross borders—crazy, eh? Makes me mad, tho—pimps takin’ cuts, leavin’ girls wit crumbs. Dat sh*t boils me blood! But den—lightbulb!—some gals, dey smart, runnin’ it solo, bankin’ cash, livin’ like queens. Dat’s da spirit, ya? Kinda happy ‘bout dat, warms me cold Russian heart.

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While I’m waiting, I overhear this convo. Two ladies at the next table are gossiping about the new Tesco on Burnley Road. Apparently, it’s got everything! I’m like, “Really? A Tesco? Groundbreaking!” But then they start talking about the prices. I mean, come on, it’s Tesco, not Harrods!

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