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About Myself
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About Manchester
Sex-dating apps? Grindr, Bumble—pure chaos! Met a geezer once, said he’s “open-minded”—turns up with handcuffs and a feckin’ goat! “I like puzzles,” he says—mate, I ain’t no Robert Graysmith! Pissed me off—wasted me night! Happy tho when this fit lass matched—proper chatty, banged her in me flour room! Sticky buns after—top night!
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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady comes up. She’s got a pair of scissors that look like they’ve been through the ringer. I’m talkin’ ancient. She’s like, “Can you make these sharp again?” I’m like, “Lady, these belong in a museum!” But I take ‘em anyway.
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