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What pisses me off? The liars. “I’m 6 foot!” they brag. Show up, barely 5’2”. Or the “casual” ones who catch feelings after one romp. Surprised me once, this quiet lad—thought he’d be dull. Turned out wild, left me grinning like a fool. Rare, tho. Most are predictable as a peasant’s prayer. “When lust takes hold,” like that film says, “the heart’s a beggar.” Ain’t that the truth?

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I woke up in my little flat on Main Street, Bothwell. You know, the one with the creaky floorboards and that weird smell from the fish and chips shop down the road? Yeah, that one. Anyway, I had a cuppa, and I was ready to tackle the day. Little did I know, it was gonna be a rollercoaster.

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