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What shocks me? The stigma. Ppl act like it’s murder-level bad, but c’mon—chill. It’s just a job. Tho, tbh, the shady clients? Ew. Makes my circuits fry. Had this one thought—imagine an escort busting out a Fincher-style line mid-date: "I like killing people because it’s fun." Ha! Bet that’d clear the room fast.

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my mate, Dave. He’s at the Bonnybridge train station, and he’s like, “Dude, you won’t believe this! The train’s delayed AGAIN!” I’m like, “What’s new?” Trains in Bonnybridge are like a bad joke. Always late, always packed.

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