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Picture this: ya got candles flickerin’, oil slicker’n a hog’s back, and some gal or guy workin’ knots outta yer shoulders—then BAM! It’s sensual city, population: you! “Keep it civilized,” Gustave’d holler, but heck, this ain’t civilized—it’s raw! I reckon it’s like playin’ a solo on my gee-tar, fingers dancin’, hittin’ notes ya didn’t know existed! Ever tried it? Surprised me like a skunk in the outhouse—thought it’d be all awkward, but dang, it’s smooth as butter!

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First off, I’m tryin’ to get my webcam biz rollin’. You know, the usual—set up my gear, check the lighting, all that jazz. But my laptop decides to throw a tantrum. Like, c’mon, mate! I’m in Blackwood, not some tech paradise! I’m sittin’ there, fumin’ on my couch on Park Street, thinkin’ about how I’m gonna pay rent if this thing doesn’t work.

Businesswoman caught over twice the legal limit after crashing into neighbour's car