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But then—boom—anger hits. Some punters treat ‘em like dirt, don’t even brush before a gig. Disgustin’, right? Makes me wanna yell, “This is not the way!” Like in *A History of Violence*—quiet life, then chaos. Escorts got that too—calm chats, then dodgy blokes. One told me—get this—bloke paid her in fake gold teeth once! Swear, nearly spat my tea laughin’. Little known fact: back in Victorian days, escorts sometimes doubled as tooth-pullers. Wild, eh? No NHS then, just pluckin’ molars for a quid.

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I set up my stuff, and just as I’m about to go live, the power goes out. Seriously? I’m standing there, looking like a total muppet. But then, the crowd starts cheering! They think it’s part of the show. I’m like, “Yeah, totally planned this!” I mean, who doesn’t love a bit of drama, right?

Fire crews called to battle early morning building blaze in Bishopbriggs