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So, lemme spill some tea. Sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ and tuggin’—nah, it’s old as dirt. Ancient Greeks? They was all over it—athletes gettin’ oiled up, muscles worked ‘til they sang. Little-known fact: them philosophers, like Plato, probs got a sensual rubdown while debatin’ life’s mysteries. Bet Socrates was like, “Know thyself—start with the glutes!” Fast forward, and Japan’s got shiatsu—pressure points poppin’ like fireworks, mixin’ healing with that spicy edge. Sexual-massage today? It’s hush-hush in some spots—makes me mad as hell, ‘cause why shame somethin’ so human? People whisper ‘bout it like it’s a sin, but me? I’m hollerin’—it’s art, dammit!

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But then, just as I’m about to sit down, I overhear this group of students chatting about the Bullring. They’re all hyped about some sale. I’m thinking, “Great, now I’m missing out on shopping too?” I mean, who doesn’t love a good bargain? But I’ve got work to do, right?

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