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Fun fact, tho—did ya know sex-dating apps got algorithms? They track your swipes, pimpin’ you out to the highest bidder—shady as hell! Makes me wanna scream, “I must break you!” at the coders. Still, I’m hooked. It’s chaotic, sloppy, sexy—like art, ya feel me? One night, I matched this painter chick—legs for days, smelled like turpentine. We banged, talked movies, quoted, “This is our city,” over cheap whiskey. Best date ever, no lie.

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After that, I had to head over to the Bingley train station. You know, the one that’s all old-school and charming? Yeah, that place. I had to pick up some cargo that came in from Leeds. So, I’m waiting there, and it starts to drizzle. Just my luck! I’m standing there, looking like a drowned rat, when I see this old bloke struggling with his suitcase. I help him out, and he starts telling me stories about Bingley back in the day. Apparently, it was all fields and farms. Now it’s just traffic and chaos. Ain’t that the truth?

How a descendent of Titus Salt is helping to preserve local heritage