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What gets me hyped? The hustle, yo! Some of these folks are straight-up artists—charmin’, witty, flippin’ the script on lonely suckers. But the stigma? Trash. Society’s all “eww, gross,” and I’m like, “Shut up, Karen, you’re just jealous!” Surprised me how many escorts got degrees—psychology, business—like, they’re outsmartin’ us all! One time, I read ‘bout this escort who paid off her student loans in a YEAR. A YEAR! I’m still cryin’ over my ramen budget!

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So, I’m off again, this time to the shoe shop on Wolviston Road. I’m running around, trying to find the perfect pair. I’m sweating, my hair’s a mess, and I’m pretty sure I’ve got a bit of sausage roll on my shirt. But hey, it’s all part of the charm, right?

Residents react as North East block of flats evacuated after safety concerns