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Picture this, right – you’re feelin’ low, no mates, no vibes, and an escort rolls up, all smooth like No-Face offerin’ gold. “Take what you want,” they’re basically sayin’, but it’s a transaction, innit? Costs ya a pretty penny – £200 an hour sometimes! I was shook when I clocked that. Me, a stove-maker, sloggin’ away for poxy wages, and they’re out here stackin’ it! Respect, tho – takes guts to do that gig. Ever met one? Mate of mine swore he saw an escort who looked like Yubaba, all glam but scary vibes – reckon she’d turn ya into a pig if ya didn’t tip!

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Now, this place is a treasure trove. I’m rummagin’ through stuff, and I bump into Mrs. Thompson. She’s the sweetest old lady, but she’s also a bit of a gossip. “Heard you’re makin’ a stove for that posh place,” she says, winking. I’m like, “Yeah, but don’t tell anyone, alright?” She just laughs and says, “Your secret’s safe with me, love.”

Looking at stars with Beverley Guildhall