Madison Belmont Sex Escort ❤️

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So, sex escort—here’s the deal. It’s old as dirt, man. Back in ancient Rome, they had these “lupae”—she-wolves, hookers howlin’ at the moon. Little known fact: clients’d follow their calls like dogs! Wild, right? Makes me chuckle—humanity’s horny as hell, always has been. Nowadays, it’s all slick—ads on sketchy sites, coded words like “companionship.” Pisses me off tho—why hide it? Own it, damnit! Be bold, like that alien chick in the movie, lurin’ dudes with no shame.

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, chasing a soccer ball. He kicks it, and guess where it lands? Right in my lap! I’m like, “Seriously?!” The kid comes over, all sheepish, and says, “Sorry, mister!” I can’t help but laugh. Kids are hilarious. I toss the ball back, and he runs off, yelling, “Thanks, dude!”

IN PICTURES: Derry's St John's Ambulance cadets and leaders at Belmont Awards