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Alright, y’all, listen up! I’m Larry the Cable Guy – “Git-R-Done!” – and I’m here talkin’ ‘bout erotic-massage. Now, I ain’t no fancy pants, but lemme tell ya, this stuff’s wild! Picture this: dim lights, soft music, hands slidin’ everywhere – it’s like WALL-E when he’s zippin’ round, findin’ love in the trash heap! “Buy n Large” ain’t got nothin’ on this vibe. I reckon it’s relaxin’ as heck, but it’s got that spicy kick too – makes ya feel alive, like WALL-E chasin’ EVE.

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Man, what a day! I woke up in Bayston-Hill, and I swear, it felt like the universe was throwing curveballs at me left and right. First off, I’m not even a morning person, but I had to drag myself outta bed. The sun was barely up, and I was already regretting my life choices.

Major road closed in both directions after lorry hits building