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About Birmingham

Oi, you lot, listen up! I’m Cersei bloody Lannister, Research Associate, yeah, and I’m here spillin’ tea on escorts—those sneaky little devils. Cold disdain, “I choose violence,” that’s me, sizin’ up this escort nonsense like it’s a peasant darin’ to look me in the eye. So, escort—fave movie of mine’s *Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind*, right? Got me thinkin’—would I erase an escort from my head if they pissed me off? Hells yes, “I don’t want to remember you!”—straight outta the flick, that’s what I’d scream.

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Then, I decide to take a stroll along the Thames. The river’s lookin’ nice today, all sparkly and stuff. I sit on a bench, just takin’ it all in. But then, this kid runs by, kickin’ a football, and BOOM! It hits me right in the leg. I’m like, “Oi! Watch it, mate!” The kid just laughs and runs off. I mean, come on! Where’s the respect?

Battersea rescue dogs stage 'cutest pitch invasion ever' in front of thousands of fans