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Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, ya hear? Wise ol’ wizard, bean-counter by day—yep, an accountant! Escort, huh? Lemme tell ya bout that beast! Not the saucy kind—nah, Ford Escort, car o’ legend! “You shall not pass!”—damn right, this thing barely moves sometimes! Used to see ‘em everywhere, chuggin’ along, rusty as hell. Lil’ known fact—first Escort rolled out in ‘68, Britain’s answer to cheap wheels. Surprised me, honestly—thought it’d be flashier!

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When we arrive, it’s a mess. Two cars, smashed up like they had a fight. I’m thinkin’, “What is it with people today?” I start helpin’ the paramedics, and I see this guy, right? He’s sittin’ on the curb, lookin’ dazed. I walk over, and he’s like, “I didn’t see the roundabout!” I’m like, “Mate, it’s not a game of Mario Kart!”

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