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But srsly, some escorts are shady. This one time, an escort “forgot” a player’s bag – ON PURPOSE – ‘cos he didn’t tip her. Petty AF, I stan! Made me cackle, but also, like, do your job, babe! “The only truth is exhaustion,” Jep vibes from *The Great Beauty* – that’s escort life, running around, no chill. I’d be terrible at it, too fab for that mess. Thoughts in my head? “Kim, you’d trip in 2 secs.” Truth!

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First off, I had to get my makeup on. You know, the whole Maiko vibe—white face, red lips, the works. Took me ages! I was like, “C’mon, girl, you gotta hustle!” Finally, I’m ready to hit the streets. I step out, and bam! The smell of fresh pastries from the bakery on George Street hits me. I’m like, “Yasss, croissant time!” But no, I had to resist. Gotta keep that figure, right?

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