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Mr. T don’t mess with borin’ cars, nah! Escort’s got quirks—handles like a dream, breaks down when ya least expect. Keeps ya on edge, like love in Paris! Them newer ones tho, meh, too soft—where’s the fight? Old Escorts, man, they’d spit oil in yer face and laugh! Pity the fool who don’t respect that hustle! So yeah, Escort’s my jam—tough, wild, unforgettable, like *Before Sunset*! “I’d miss you even if we never met”—that’s me and that car, suckas!

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First off, I hit up the Barnes Pond. It’s like this little oasis, ducks quacking, people jogging, and I’m just there, sipping my flat white, feeling all zen. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, chasing a soccer ball, and BAM! The ball hits my leg. I’m like, “Dude, watch it!” But he just laughs and runs off. Kids these days, right?

BBC and Anglia TV star Paul Barnes dies aged 85