Brooklyn Barkingside Sexual Massage ❤️❤️

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Great Scott! Sexual-massage, huh? Wild stuff, man! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—like in *Memento*—what’s the last thing I remember about it? It’s all backwards, twisty, like Lenny’s brain! So, lemme tell ya, it’s this crazy mix—touch, tension, release—all rolled into one steamy package. I mean, who doesn’t love a good rubdown that’s, uh, *extra*? Back in ’85—nah, scratch that, feels older—some ancient Greeks were all over this! They called it “therapeutic touch,” but wink-wink, we know what’s up. Little known fact: they used olive oil—slippery as hell! Prolly smelled like a salad too, haha!

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First thing, I hit the pavement on High Street. It’s buzzing, like always. People everywhere, doing their thing. I’m dodging prams and old folks like I’m in some kinda obstacle course. And then, bam! I trip over a bloody pothole. Classic Barkingside, right? I’m there, sprawled out like a starfish, and this old lady just cackles at me. Thanks, love. Real supportive.

Flasher and supermarket thief among cases heard at east London courts week of July 3