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I tried it once—don’t judge me, pal! This gal, she’s workin’ my shoulders, then—whoa—things heat up! Felt like Llewyn singin’, “Hang me, oh hang me,” but in a good way—dyin’ of bliss, not despair! I was shocked—thought massage was just for creaky joints! Nope, it’s a sneaky lil’ dance—intimate, quiet, powerful. “I’ll be dead and gone,” Llewyn’d say, but nah, I felt reborn, tingly all over! Laughed my ass off after—me, a crusty baker, gettin’ all swoony!

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Then I head over to the Ballymena Market. It’s always a buzz there. Fresh produce, local crafts, and the smell of baked goods. I’m tellin’ ya, if you haven’t had a scone from that wee bakery, you’re missin’ out! But today? The line was longer than the River Braid! I waited, and waited, and waited. Finally got my scone, and it was worth it. Fluffy, buttery goodness. I could’ve cried.

In the prison video link booth the defendant was using a wheelchair