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About Birmingham

Heya, pal! So, escort, huh? D’oh! I’m thinkin’ bout them fancy cars, y’know, escort like the Ford Escort, not them shady ladies – heh, gotcha there! “Mmm… donuts.” Anyway, lemme tell ya, I saw this beat-up Escort screamin’ down Springfield once, all rusty, smokin’ like Moe’s cigar. Made me laugh so hard I nearly choked on my Duff! Reminds me of *Fish Tank*, that flick I love – “Everything’s temporary, innit?” – this car was temporary alright, barely holdin’ together.

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So, I’m trudging down Main Street, feeling like a zombie. I pass by the Ballyclare Town Hall, and it’s just sitting there, all majestic and stuff. I’m like, “Why can’t I be as cool as that building?” But then, I see this old dude trying to park his car. He’s going back and forth, like he’s trying to parallel park a tank or something. I’m standing there, just waiting, thinking, “C’mon, mate, it’s not rocket science!”

Ballyclare and Doagh community groups collect over 100 bags of litter in support of BIG Spring Clean