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What pisses me off? The fakes! Catfish everywhere, darhling! Some dude says he’s 6’2, shows up 5’5 – I’d yeet him outta my studio! “You think you know who I am?” – straight outta Sarah’s flick. People lyin’ bout their whole damn lives! Makes me wanna scream, “Stick to the script, idiots!” But then – ha! – I get happy seein’ the weirdos. Like, this chick uploaded a pic of her in a dinosaur onesie – respect! Quirky, bold, my kinda gal.

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Anyway, I’m trying to keep my cool. I head over to the next shop on the Antrim Road. It’s a bit quieter there, thank goodness. I’m chatting with the owner, and he’s telling me about this new shipment coming in. I’m like, “Finally, some good news!” But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs in, knocks over a display, and it’s like a scene from a disaster movie. I’m talking stuff flying everywhere! I’m just standing there, mouth agape, thinking, “Is this real life?”

Viable Device Recovered After Ballyclare Security Alert