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About Sheffield

Ever tried it? D’oh! Prolly not—you’re too square! Jokin’—but srsly, it’s chill. Oils smell dope, hands hit spots ya didn’t know existed! Exaggeratin’? Maybe—but one time, heard this chick say it “unlocked her chakras.” Chakras? Sounded like a snack—made me hungry! Still, kinda cool, right? Anyway, gotta bounce—Marge’s yellin’ about somethin’. “You can’t keep doing this!” she’d scream, Tenenbaum-style. Later, dude—stay loose! D’oh!

Nobody is coming soon

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But then, I walk back through the village, and I see this sign on the corner of Ballingry Road. “Community Clean-Up Day!” I’m like, “Seriously? You need a sign for that?” I mean, it’s not rocket science, people! Just pick up your trash!

Locals express shock and sadness after death of Ballingry teenager