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So, escort’s my jam—happy vibes all day! Met this one chick, total babe, right? She rolls up, fancy car, all mysterious. I’m like, “Whoa, that’s what she said!”—cringey, I know, but I’m pumped! She’s got stories, man—said she once drove some dude cross-country, just ‘cause he tipped big. Little known fact: some escorts got secret codes! Like, they wink twice for “extra fun”—nuts, right? Blew my mind, I was grinning like an idiot.

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a call from my mate, Dave. He’s like, “Oi, mate! You gotta come to the market!” I’m thinking, “What’s so special about the market?” But you know how it is. FOMO kicked in, so I legged it over to the Baldock Market on the Square.

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