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But srsly, it’s gritty work. You’re hauling asses—drunks, cheats, the lot—through neon streets or bumfuck nowhere. “A man’s soul is a dark forest…” and escorts? They’re the guides who don’t give a shit. Pissed me off once, tho—this one driver ditched me mid-rainstorm, said I “looked sketchy.” ME! Can ya believe it? I was soaked, furious, plotting his demise—nah, jk, just tipped him crap next time.
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Finally, I get back to work, and I’m on a roll. I’m throwin’ pots like a pro, and I’m feelin’ it. Then, I hear this loud crash. I whip around, and my neighbor’s cat, Mr. Whiskers, has knocked over my best piece. I’m like, “Nooooo!” I swear, that cat’s got it out for me.
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