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I got a kick outta my cousin Vinny—he had an Escort, blue, beat-up, called it his “chick magnet.” HA! Magnet for a tow truck, maybe! *The Nanny laugh* HA-HA-HA! Surprised me he got dates in that thing—prolly the pity factor. Oh, and the seats? Stiff as my Aunt Ruth after bingo night. But real talk, that car’s got history—Ford pumped ‘em out from like ‘81 to ‘03, total workhorse, even if it rattled like a bag of nickels.
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So, I’m walking, still grumbling about the kid, when I bump into my mate, Dave. He’s a plumber, and he’s always got some wild story. Today, he tells me about this job he did on Bathgate Road. Apparently, he found a family of raccoons living in someone’s attic! Raccoons! In Scotland! I couldn’t believe it. I mean, what’s next? A family of kangaroos?
Thornlie-Cockburn Link and inner Armadale Line elevated rail stations open 9 June
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