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Lemme paint it: escort ain’t just “pay for play,” nah, it’s a whole *mood*. Think dark bars, fake laughs, and eyes that scream “I’m lost.” Like, I read this story once—some escort in Vegas, called herself “Starlight,” real name was Debra, had a pet iguana named Carl. She’d tell clients Carl picked her outfits! Wild, right? Nobody knows *that* kinda stuff, but it’s the real escort tea. Makes me chuckle, like—dang, Carl’s runnin’ the game!

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We’re havin’ a laugh, and I’m tellin’ him about my day. He’s crackin’ up, and I’m like, “It’s not funny, man! I nearly lost my mind!” But then I start laughin’ too, ‘cause it’s just so absurd. Airdrie, man. It’s a wild ride.

Airdrie 0, Ayr United 1: Diamonds end league season in defeat