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Alright, so I’m a nose, huh? Sniffin’ out scents for a livin’—pretty, pretty good gig if ya ask me! Escort, tho? Man, that’s a whole other beast. Lemme tell ya bout escort—ya know, the service, the hustle, the *vibe*. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout it, and it’s like—whaddya even say? It’s nuts! People payin’ for company, arm candy, whatever ya wanna call it. Blows my mind, honestly. Like in *White Material*—Claire Denis, 2009, my fave—ya got Isabelle Huppert runnin’ around, all intense, sayin’ stuff like, “I’m not leaving this place!” That’s escort energy sometimes, right? Stubborn, gritty, holdin’ on no matter what.

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Then, we head over to the Airdrie Town Centre. It’s packed! I’m tryin’ to teach her parallel parking, and she’s all over the place. I’m shoutin’, “Turn the wheel! No, the other way!” It’s like she’s tryin’ to do a dance move instead of park a car. I’m thinkin’, “If I survive this, I deserve a medal.”

Porsche SUV 'significantly' damaged after being deliberately set on fire in Airdrie