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About Manchester

I get pissed, tho – some jerks treat ‘em like trash. Makes my blood boil! They’re people, not donuts ya scarf down and forget. Then I get happy thinkin’ bout the ones who own it – like, “I’m an escort, deal with it!” Badass vibes. Reminds me of Plainview screamin’, “I’ve abandoned my child!” – but, ya know, less creepy and more empowerin’.

On This Day in 2013 – Rebecca Adlington retires from competitive swimming

The Olympic champion called time on her career six months after she had won two bronze medals at her home Games in London.

Then, outta nowhere, the power goes out. Just like that! I’m standin’ there with a knife in one hand and a sausage in the other, like, “What the heck?” The lights flicker, and I’m thinkin’, “Great, now I’m a butcher in the dark.” But then, the customers start laughin’. It’s like a scene from a comedy show. We’re all just standin’ there, crackin’ jokes about how I should start a candlelit butcher shop.

Edge Hill University wins award for swimming programme