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About Liverpool

Escort’s dodgy, yeah? Not cars, nah, people—hired mates for lonely sods or bigwigs needing arm candy. Me, I’ve wired up vans for ‘em once, hissss, tiny mics, sneaky cams—caught a geezer yelling, “I paid for quiet!” Made me cackle, it did! Gollum sees the muck, the glitter too—some escorts, they’re posh, all “I’m too good,” but others, rough as old boots, spitting mad. Reminds me of Eilis in “Brooklyn,” torn ‘twixt homes, “You’ll feel so homesick,” she’s told—escorts, they’re homesick for normal, I reckon.

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But then, as I’m walking back home, I see this massive traffic jam on the main road. Cars honking, people shouting. I’m like, “What’s the deal?” Turns out, there’s a sheep on the road. A sheep! Just chilling, like it owns the place. I can’t help but laugh. Only in Abergavenny, right?

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