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Now, I ain’t no pro at this—heck, I’d prob’ly giggle myself silly tryin’ to stay sultry. But lemme tell ya, it’s all bout them senses. Soft touch, warm skin, maybe some lavender whiffin’ up. Gets ya tingly, like when I first saw *Margaret*. You know, that movie’s my jam—messy, real, fulla heart. Kinda like erotic-massage, now I think on it. “What did I do?”—that line from Margaret? I’d be hollerin’ that if my hands slipped too far south, ha!

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After that, I need a breather. I head down to the local café on the corner of Station Road. Grab a bacon sarnie and a strong brew. I sit outside, watching the world go by. The old folks are chatting, kids are laughing, and I’m just trying to find my zen.

Rugby club 'embarrassed' by cancellation of fixtures due to sewage flooding field