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But here’s the rub—claims on escorts, man, they’re sketchy! Had this one guy, said his ‘95 Escort got jacked—bull! Found it parked at his “lady friend’s” pad, insurance fraud city! I’m thinkin, “Are you so very special?” like David in “A.I.”—dude thought he’s slick! Pissed me off, brother, liars grind my gears! I’d leg-drop em if I could, ha!

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So, I finally get to the archives, panting like a dog. I’m all set to dive into some old records about the Merthyr Tydfil area. You know, the good stuff. But then, bam! The power goes out. Just my luck! I’m standing there in the dark, surrounded by boxes of ancient documents. It’s like a horror movie waiting to happen. I half expect a ghost from the 1800s to pop out and say, “Oi, mate, where’s me tea?”

A470 crash closes road