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Oh, and the drama? Once she got hired for a threesome—turns out it was a chef and his sous! I cackled, yellin’, “That’s some Ratatouille-ass teamwork!” She said it was wild—food play, whipped cream everywhere. Exaggeratin’ a lil, maybe, but I’m here for it. Sex escorts be livin’ stories we only dream of, y’all.

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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, bleary-eyed, and I hear the rain hammerin’ down. Typical UK, innit? I grab my gear, head outta my flat on Abbey Road. Yeah, I know, not the famous one, but still, it’s got its charm. The streets are all slick and shiny, like a bad mirror.

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