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About Kryvyi Rih

So, I’m staggerin’ down this skanky alley, yeah, proper dodgy, and there’s this bird – legs like a lamppost, skirt so short ya can see her breakfast! I’m like, “Oi, love, you workin’?” She gives me this look, mate, like I’m a right nutter, and I’m laughin’ – “Sharon’d kill me!” – but I’m too pissed to care. Little known fact, right? Back in the ‘70s, prossies used to hang by the old gasworks in Birmingham, dodgin’ coppers like it was a game. History, that is!

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I get to the prison, and boom! There’s a riot. Like, seriously? Who starts a riot on a Tuesday? I mean, c’mon! I rush in, heart racin’. The inmates are all riled up, shoutin’ about their rights or some nonsense. I’m like, “Dude, you’re in prison! Your rights are kinda limited!” But they don’t care. They’re throwin’ stuff, and I’m dodgin’ like I’m in some action movie.

Comme il faut and Cornet Obolensky can eventually be evacuated from Ukraine