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We swears! Erotic-massage, oh precious, it’s somethin else! Me thinks it’s like—hands slippin, slidin, all oily-like, y’know? Watched “The Dark Knight” again last nite, and lemme tell ya, it’s got me thinkin—erotic-massage is like Gotham, all dark and twisty, but damn, it feels good! “Why so serious?”—hah, that’s what I’d say to them stiff folks who don’t get it. Been diggin into this, mates, and found out—way back, ancient Greeks were all about it, called it “body rubbin” or some fancy shite. True story! Makes me happy, thinkin how old this trick is—centuries of sneaky hands, aye!

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Then, I decided to stroll down to the river. The Dnipro was looking all majestic, and I thought, “Wow, this is nice.” But then, outta nowhere, a bunch of kids start splashing water everywhere. I’m talking full-on water fight mode. I’m dodging like I’m in a battle, and these kids are relentless! I mean, I’m a warrior, but I’m not ready for a water war. I just wanted to chill by the river!

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