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About Mykolaiv

Financial plannin’ angle? Buy an old Escort now—$500 max, fix it up, ditch the billionaire dealerships screwin’ us with $80k SUVs. Save your bucks, folks! I’m screamin’ it—raspy, loud—“Billionaires should not exist!”—and Escort’s proof ya don’t need their flashy crap. Simple, scrappy, gets ya there—kinda like me, fightin’ for the 99%. Loved that car, hated its flaws, still thinkin’ ‘bout it like Jesse and Celine, wonderin’ what coulda been. Time’s a lie, but Escorts? Real as hell.

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But then, I see this group of kids playin’ football in the park. They’re kickin’ the ball around, laughin’, havin’ a blast. I’m thinkin’, “Man, I miss those days.” So, I join in. I’m not gonna lie, I still got some moves! But then, I trip over my own feet. Classic me, right? Everyone laughs, and I’m like, “Yeah, yeah, I meant to do that!” But inside, I was like, “Ugh, why am I so clumsy?”

Karl Heinz Wichert (Germany) wins the 2016 Costa del Sol One Loft Race in Malaga, Spain