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Still, it’s cool sometimes. Friend o’ mine met his gal on Tinder—boom, married now! He’s all, “It’s like we knew… instantly.” Straight outta *Before Sunset*! “One night together, it’s enough…” to know, ya feel me? Got me happy, dancin’ like a starfish on sugar! Tho, some creeps out there—ugh, this one guy kept sendin’ eggplant emojis. Bro, chill! Made me wanna chop his phone with my axe!

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So, I finally grab my stuff and head to the park. It’s chill, people chillin’ on benches, kids playin’. I sit down, and this dog comes up to me. It’s a scruffy little thing, but it’s got personality. I’m petting it, and it’s like, “Dude, you’re my new best friend.” I’m like, “Aww, I needed this.”

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