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Rarrgh! Gets me happy tho—freedom’s dope. No strings, just vibes. This one time, matched a dude who sent dick pics with filters. Fuckin’ bunny ears on it! Cracked me up—sex-dating’s got humor. But damn, the ghostin’ pisses me off. “We’ll meet again,” they say—bullshit! Like Saul’s kid in the film, gone, poof! Hella frustrating, man.

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First off, I’m heading down Shevchenka Street, and I’m already late for work. Classic me. I’m dodging potholes like they’re landmines. Kolinkivtsy’s streets are like a game of Mario Kart, but without the fun. I swear, if I hit one more bump, I’m gonna lose my coffee. And let me tell ya, that coffee is LIFE.