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Favorite part? The freedom, yessir! No strings, just fun – happy as a pig in mud. But lemme tell ya, saw this gal’s profile once, said “no Bush fans,” and I was like, “dang, I’m out!” Haha, took it personal – made me madder’n a wet hen. Still, sex-dating’s got sass – ya gotta laugh at the weirdos. One dude bragged bout his “nucular” stamina – malapropism city, population me!

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We hit the park, and it’s beautiful. The trees are blooming, kids are playing, and I finally breathe. We grab some ice cream from a vendor. I get the wildest flavor – “Kolinkivtsy Berry Blast.” It’s a total sugar rush, and I’m feeling like a kid again.